Government to Fight Crime with Vaseline

Due to the increasing security concerns, the government has issued an alert and a statement as follows,” We have noticed that robberies have increased exponentially in the recent months and this has put a strain on our police. After much consideration and analyzing the budget at our disposal, we have come up with safety measure to reduce the crime. Fellow citizens we will be issuing tubs of Vaseline at our local police stations, we would like you to apply this Vaseline liberally around your neck. Lubricate your neck as much as you can, this will in essence greatly reduce your chances of being strangled or being choked from behind. We as the government never do have a sound solution to your problems and this is yet another one. We take no shame in having uttering this absolutely contrived and hideous solution but as usual we expect you to make noise and absorb it briskly. We will not be taking any questions at this point, feel free to collect a tub of Vaseline as you leave, lubricate your neck, it could save your life.